Discussion on Discussing Queer Matters with Adolescents: Majlis Launches 'Dear Parents' Initiative for Advice
The 'Dear Parents...' social media project, an initiative by queer youth in collaboration with Majlis, a Mumbai-based legal and social support group, was launched during LGBTQ Pride Month. This project aims to help parents better understand how to talk to their queer children and make it easier for them to come out.
The project provides simple, practical advice in the form of "do's and don'ts" for parents to support their children emotionally during these crucial conversations. The guidance was formulated directly from queer youths’ experiences and what they wish their parents would say or avoid saying.
The advice offered to parents centers on empathy and respect. It highlights the emotional difficulty for queer teens coming out and encourages parents to:
- Listen without judgment or immediate rejection.
- Avoid dismissive or harmful phrases that invalidate their child's identity.
- Offer reassurance, love, and acceptance to foster a safe space.
- Understand that the coming-out process can be gradual and requires patience.
The social media format was chosen to reach a wider audience and spark more supportive conversations within families. The project consists of three sets of counsel to parents on the do's and don'ts when their children talk to them about their sexuality.
One of the key messages in the project is the importance of understanding that exploring identity is a normal part of growth and should be encouraged. A father whose daughter identifies as gay spoke about the importance of treating the issue with sensitivity and dignity, and the need for more awareness and education, especially for those in their fifties and sixties.
The project also aims to help parents make it easier for their children to come out of the closet as queer individuals. It emphasises that parents should not blame themselves or their child, with phrases like 'We gave you too much freedom, that's why you turned out like this' being discouraged. Instead, parents are encouraged to say, 'I may not have grown up with this, but I'm willing to learn with you.'
The project has received a lot of responses from people who identify as queer and was forwarded to parents who reached out to the organisers. It was translated into Kannada by Dr. Sangeeta Saksena, co-founder of Enfold Proactive Health Trust, Bengaluru, to reach a wider community. The organisation plans to translate it into other languages as well.
In conclusion, the 'Dear Parents...' project serves as a valuable resource for parents navigating the complexities of their child coming out as queer. By promoting empathy, understanding, and acceptance, it fosters a supportive environment for queer youth and encourages open and honest conversations within families.
[1] For more information, please visit the project's social media page.
The 'Dear Parents...' social media project extends its focus beyond emotional support, offering educational resources for parents on various aspects of queer experiences. Parents are encouraged to learn about mental-health concerns and health-and-wellness practices directly related to their children's identities. [2] Additionally, the project provides insights into the realm of science, emphasizing that understanding sexuality is a fundamental step towards acceptance, promoting a more educated and supportive society. [3] With the translation of the project into multiple languages, the project team aims to not only widen its reach to diverse communities but also educate and encourage mental-health awareness, allowing parents to address issues of mental well-being within their families with sensitivity and understanding.
