Experiencing grief: When individuals end their lives, leaving behind mourning relatives
In a quiet, protected setting in Spandau, Berlin, a group of individuals gather each Monday evening to share their stories, find solace, and offer guidance. These individuals are bound by a tragic experience - each has lost a loved one to suicide.
Ilona Lueth, a former head of the customs department in a medium-sized company, and Patricia Gerstendoerfer, a volunteer group leader for over a decade, are among those who have found solace in this group. They, like many others, believe that every suicide leaves a trail of grief, with each person affected experiencing a life-changing event.
Patricia's husband chose a time when she was 600 kilometers away, while Ilona's husband took his life six years ago. Both women sought help and found it in the same Berlin-based organisation, "AGUS Selbsthilfegruppen".
The organisation, which has been offering support for over 20 years, aims to help those left behind by suicide. They believe that many of these people need help, and they are not alone in this belief. Ilona, for instance, estimates that every suicide leaves six to ten people affected.
The global suicide rate has seen a significant decrease over the past three decades, falling by almost 30% between 1990 and 2021. However, this trend has reversed in some countries since 2021, a fact that Ute Lewitzka, a suicide prevention expert, attributes to the impact of crises and war.
In Germany, the increase has been particularly noticeable. Data from the Federal Statistical Office shows an almost 10% increase from 2021 to 2022. People from marginalized groups, including those who have had traumatic life experiences, those affected by displacement and migration, those living with physical or mental illnesses, and members of the LGBTQ+ community are at higher risk, according to Lewitzka.
The reasons for the increase in suicide rates since 2021 are not yet scientifically established. However, Lewitzka points to the impact of crises and war as potential factors. The older men get, the greater the suicide risk, she adds.
The group meetings offer a safe space for participants to share their stories, find comfort in shared experiences, and gain insights into coping mechanisms. One participant is mourning her sister who was in the midst of sitting for her high school exams, while another is mourning her grandmother who had lost the will to live.
The meetings are not just a platform for sharing stories, but also a resource for those seeking help. Resources such as coffee, tea, tissues, brochures, and flyers about assistance programs are available.
Patricia Gerstendoerfer, who once considered taking her own life after her husband's suicide in 2007, is now a volunteer in suicide prevention and grief counseling. She feels that her best friend moving next door may have saved her life.
Ilona Lueth, who found the group after seeking help, is also now a volunteer. She believes that by sharing their experiences, they can help others who are struggling.
The availability of firearms plays a central role in the higher suicide rates in the US. However, in Germany, the focus is on providing support and resources for those who are struggling. The group meetings, held in an old building in Spandau, Berlin, offer a beacon of hope for those who have been affected by suicide.
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